sunrise @ The Strait of Johor

sunrise @ The Strait of Johor, originally uploaded by nadi0.

I just got back from a trip to Singapore. Stayed in JB, in a place called Compact Hotel. When I arrived on Friday night, i complained about the car lift and the dodgy looking room. They had a Midnight Special of RM100, and I don't really want to know what that is. hehee..Then, I woke up at 7AM from the sunlight pouring through the window, and saw this wonderful sunrise.

My beloved camera almost got stuck outside the dirty window when i attempted to slip the camera through the small opening. I'm never going to try that again, it almost gave me a heart attack when I realized I couldn't slip the camera back in so easily. had to detach the lense before I could get the camera safely back inside the room. hehehe.

Singapore was awesome. The zoo was awesome. Too many people even at 9.30AM, but for RM15, i am not going to complain. The sale was good too, but I didn't buy much for myself. Went to look for camera stuff for my friends, and ended up buying the all the remaining stock of Sanyo Eneloop batteries at this camera shop in Peninsula Plaza.

Then I hung out at the Esplanade, the Merlion Park...all the normal stuff. A laid-back weekend, other than my legs now feel like they're going to break from too much walking.

Oh. And thanks to Najah who pointed me to Ayam Bakar Ojolali in Lucky Plaza. Man....that's the best tasting chicken i've ever had! yummmmy! I wanted to take home some with me, but i wasn't sure if it will still be as good when it gets to KL..next time maybe.

am going to rest now. work tomorrow.

night.

Traumatic Wednesday

in the past 3 years...i've had many invasive procedures done on me.

- blood tests (probably a thousand times)
- bone marrow biopsies (i lost count of how many)
- insertion of hickman line (twice)
- insertions of lines on my neck, arm and thigh
- bronchoscopy
- spleen biopsy
- lung biopsy

and the list continues...

and you may see me as a strong person, but most of the procedures usually end up in me crying or screaming and left me feeling rather fucked up for a couple of days.

yesterday morning, i had an upper intestine endoscopy procedure - am i using the right term docs? and of course, my standard question would be, would i be sedated, and if no, can i please be sedated?

unfortunately the doc declined my request. he said he wants to save my veins from being damaged. so, he gave me a throat anesthetic...it sort of numbed my throat..but i was fully aware of what was going on. and guess what? of course when i saw the scope, i freaked out! i fought, screamed and cried. and 16 hours after the procedure, i my throat and tummy still feel sore from my fighting the scope from entering my esophagus. the mental image won't go away, and i still feel like crying whenever i think about it. like right now.

why would anyone have to go through such trauma when they can be sedated?

i asked the doc why not, the only reason he gave was:
1. because he wanted to save my veins

but here are my reasons:
1. so i don't get freaked out and start to struggle
2. so i don't fight and hurt my throat
3. so i don't start screaming in the room like a mental patient, hence scaring the other patients
4. so the poor nice doctor doesn't label me as a difficult patient
5. so i don't feel angry for the whole day and have nowhere to channel the anger to
6. so i get to wake up 1 or 2 hours later groggy, but at least i'll be in a pleasant mood
7. so i don't feel traumatized and invaded for the whole day, which will end up in me sleeping until it's dinner time, which i think is a friggin' waste of time. and i still wake up in a foul mood.

it's 2 AM, and i can't sleep because i slept the whole day, and i still feel pretty fucked up.

i know, my mother says that i need to be strong and have willpower. fighting leukemia was a long and arduous journey for me, and these days, if i can avoid any discomfort, i will avoid it. my veins will regrow, but will the traumatic experience fade from my memory? right, why not just add another bad experience to her long list of bad experiences?

nevertheless, at the expense of my feeling horribly fucked up, the result of the scope was normal, thank God. :-) and i hope i never have to go through such a procedure again in my entire life.

have i said that i feel so fucked up now?

Cookie

Cookie Cat, originally uploaded by nadi0.

i haven't written about cats in a long long while.

well, this is a story about a cat named Cookie.

she was born in Taman Seputeh in August 2003, just before Merdeka Day. she became really sick circa late 2004 while i was fighting leukemia..the vet said she had skin cancer. You can see the lesions on her body in the picture. but she lived a full year, before she went missing sometime in early 2006. i assumed she died away from home and prayed that she died painlessly.

then tonight...while i was stumbling in the dark backyard to put food for Baby and Tompok, i heard the sound of a leash bell. the cat purr near my legs sounded strangely familiar. it felt like a lean, short-haired cat...and my heart skipped. shit, did Baby lose all her hair from the skin ointment i put on her? (Baby is having some skin problems too...)

i quickly reached for the switch to turn on the lights, and voila! there was Cookie...munching on the food i had just poured for the other cats. and she looks all better now..she looks older, but it was her!

i believed that she became ill because she was trying to absorb some of my pain when i was sick, and now that i'm better, she got better too. i guess that belief isn't too far-fetched then.

thank you to that kind person out there who took care of her when i couldn't. if she drops by to see me once in a while, that's more than enough for me, to know that she's OK and well-taken care of.

i'm now wondering if Alf and Owen could still be alive. :-)

p/s: Baby, after the maid left and all her three babies died, has gone into depression mode, and now looks more like a germ-infested stray cat rather than a persian. she's got these disgusting crustings on her ears, and she keeps going back into the maid's room to lie down on her bed. :-( it's so sad to see her like that. hope she feels better.

Jangan Pandang Belakang

farah low-key, originally uploaded by nadi0.

not that i'm saying that the subject in the portrait looks like a hantu...hehe. totally not.

i just came back from watching the much anticipated local horror film, Jangan Pandang Belakang. Everybody was too scared to watch it alone, so me and a few friends got together tonight especially to watch this film.

here's my review:

It's overrated, and wtf????

Heroes

finished watching the season finale of Heroes this morning, in my attempt to stay awake until it's time to get to work. The words of Mohinder Suresh at the end of the episode was very touching...i'm sure this paragraph is in blogs all over the world this week.

"we dream of hope, we dream of change, of fire, of love, of death...Then it happens, the dream becomes real. And the answer to this quest, this need to solve life's mysteries, finally shows itself , like the glowing light of a new dawn.

so much struggle for meaning, for purpose, and in the end we find it only in each other, our shared experience of the fantastic and the mundane. The simple human need to find a kindred, to connect, and to know in our hearts that we are not alone."

i am so going to be a zombie at work today.

...and Inzaghi scores....!!!

not that i watched the game. i went to check the score 85 minutes into the game, and found out that Inzaghi scored both the goals for Milan. yeehooo!

not that i follow the Champions League...hahaha.

I remember my college crush on Inzaghi, which made me took Italian for 2 semesters, in hope that the day I get to meet him in person, I will be able to at least have a civil conversation with him.

not that i ever got to meet him, but the A's i got for the two italian courses definitely bumped my CGPA at that time.

ok...i better go to sleep.

buona notte.

forza Inzaghi!

sunset @ Bukit Permai

vertical sunset @ Bukit Permai, originally uploaded by nadi0.

- one better sore eye
- one useless trip to the shopping mall
- one failed attempt to find the Ampang Lookout point

- one goal in life achieved.

driving through the rush hour today trying to look for the Ampang Lookout Point as described by Fariz brought me here, the Taman Bukit Permai Lookout Point. It didn't look promising at first, and just as i was about to get back into the car, the clouds started to part.

my eye is better now. i guess it's time to get back to work tomorrow.

boo hoo.

my eye

sunset @ damansara perdana, originally uploaded by nadi0.

somehow, i contracted an eye infection over the weekend. it got worse last night, all red and swollen. i think i might have to take another day off tomorrow so i don't infect people at work.

coincidentally, it's my right eye, the eye that is constantly on my viewfinder.

maybe it's time i got a disinfectant for my viewfinder.

arghh so itchy!

p/s: i don't know why i'm so bothered by something that i'm not even sure i want anymore. maybe i want it still? maybe i don't. i'm freakin' bothered, nevertheless.

eyes

eyes, originally uploaded by nadi0.

the original exposure was just begging to be processed into this.

look at those eyes.

model: Mrs. O

sunset @ KJ in HDR

sunset @ KJ in HDR, originally uploaded by nadi0.

another day, another HDR.

i'm going nuts. this addiction to HDR can be dangerous to my photo-taking skills. like i told Kichi, who cares what the original shot looks like when you can do a HDR later?

dang.

College sick

These days, when I attend talks and dialogue sessions on process improvement and quality, I keep hearing the words I used to hear in my college classes. Words and abbreviations like SEI, CMM, CMMi, maturity levels, etc.

Somehow hearing those words remind me of the indian food truck near Pitt Library (where they serve my favorite chicken tikka masala in the whole world), Kiva Han on Craig St, the pasta stand in the University Center and the Ponderosa buffet all the way in Monroeville.

Mmmph..yum!

the other side of sunrise

the other side of sunrise, originally uploaded by nadi0.

taken at Teluk Chempedak, the morning after my friends' wedding. Cloudy morning when I arrived at the beach, and it was still cloudy when I left to catch a couple more hours of sleep.

i'm going back to sleep, now that i've arrived in KL.

Miss Oh has now become Mrs Oh. Congratulations, you two!

Impossible is Nothing

Impossible is Nothing, originally uploaded by nadi0.

spent the evening in Bukit Malawati in Kuala Selangor, where the view is great and the monkeys are polite. I had no idea how far Kuala Selangor is from my house, so i let my GPS take me. damn it was far! hahahaa.. coming home was another thing, the roadsigns kept promising "Lebuhraya Guthrie" for over 20 kilometers, until i actually reached the highway.

here's a portrait of a silver-leaf monkey for you. i'm definitely going back to this place again...i didn't cover the Kuala Selangor Nature Park because by the time i reached the place, it had just closed for the day. :-( which was why i went up the hill to shoot (photograph) monkeys instead.

3 more days off and back to work..boohoo!

The Future, I Am

The Future, I Am, originally uploaded by nadi0.

Happy Labor Day, everyone!

introducing Sean, my male model of the day.

heheheh.

lights, girls, action!

my last shot, originally uploaded by nadi0.

i went to the Ultimate Street Tuners Carnival last night, replacing a friend who was supposed to take photographs there. The cars were interesting, but the major attraction (i think) was the Dancing Girls! There were too many men with SLRs around, photographing the car models and the dancing girls. i would post up a picture of the crowd cheering, but i don't want any of the men to get into trouble. hehe. thank god i had my Photographer pass so I could walk freely in front of the stage to shoot, away from the sweaty men and the wild crowd.

the event went on until 1AM, but i left early because my feet were hurting from 3 hours of walking around in 2.5 inch heels with my photo gear. i usually do that when i'm taking pictures in large crowds to gain the height, but i guess considering the tarred parking lot, it was a bad choice.

so, you car tuning freaks...check out the event! it's at the Stadium Bukit Jalil Car Park B, and it ends tomorrow night! for more info, checkout their website here.

after sleeping at 6AM...

checking scores, originally uploaded by nadi0.

i woke up too early.

bothered by the noise coming from the school in front and incoming smses on my phone.

the person who was mc-ing the event was the noisiest bit, she had a laugh like a hyena. remind me to put on earplugs before going to sleep on the weekend next time.

a picture for you. the two MCs cackling about while the kids watch the people near the board update the scores. muddy day at the field today from the storm the night before.

i know it's going to be a bad day today.

A Leopard called Manja

thinking...what's for dinner?, originally uploaded by nadi0.

i went to the zoo on my day off, and spent 3 hours hanging about the big cats' enclosures. The puma gave birth to 3 cubs, unfortunately i came too late in the afternoon, so i missed it. The 3 cubs were the cutest things on earth! Attempted to take some pictures, but the cubs were too far away, so the pictures came out shaky..:-(

Lovely day.

more pictures of Manja the Leopard and Rocky the Bengal Tiger on my flickr.

i got punked

excerpt from thestar.com:

Millions lost in e-invest scam

PENANG: Thousands of people nationwide are believed to have lost several million ringgit in an Internet “investment” scheme known as buy-e-barrel which has closed down abruptly.

Investors have been unable to log onto their online accounts over the past two weeks.

read more here...

I'm not proud to declare that I am one of the thousands who were cheated. Not by e-barrel, but by another scheme at www.abbfund.com. Don't bother clicking on the link because it doesn't work anymore. How can a person like me get cheated like that? Hey, you never try, you never know. Now if you read my previous posting on the outrageous lawyer fees, you must think I'm crazy and contradicting. hehehe...

Why am I laughing? Because when i gave that money away, it was money I was prepared to lose (plus it wasn't that much). I remember writing it off in my books that day. Still, it doesn't stop me from wishing that the crook would get caught, rot in jail and in hell. The crook is probably vacationing in the Carribeans now, having a party. Lucky bastard.

all I can say is, it was a lesson learned for me.

Fashion on 1

Topshop Model, originally uploaded by nadi0.

woke up at 2.30pm, lazed in front of the TV and started to feel hungry about 1 hour later. so i got ready to go out, with no destination in mind, and camera bag in the backseat.

called a friend, who said he's on the way to One Utama, and i suddenly remembered The Fashion on 1 thing going on at OU and it's the last day today.

i took some pictures of very good looking men. among the many other photographers there, i had some inferiority complex looking at their canggih equipment, although i kept reminding myself that it's not the equipment, it's the subject, and the photographer that are more important. yeah, whatever...i still want that fast telephoto!

then i stopped by Damansara Perdana to capture the sunset, and after dinner came home to capture the moon.

what a day.

resting

sunset @ KJ, originally uploaded by nadi0.

here's my interpretation of the doctor's rest, relax and take a lot of vitamin C. chilling around my housing area photographing orange sunsets that remind me of enormous vitamin C pills.